Listening to Taylor Swift as an Adult Child of Divorce

I remember making an entire ritual and event when Taylor Swift released “Mine” in 2010, the single from Speak Now. I curled up on the couch and put in my earbuds, pressing play with all the pomp and circumstance a fifteen year old could muster. It was the first time Taylor was releasing a single since I fell in love with her music—but that wasn’t why I remember that moment so vividly....

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Sexual Orphans: the (Sometimes) Legacy ACODs Live with Regarding the ‘Birds and the Bees’

I define the ‘sexual orphan’ as ‘anyone who has been deprived the protection or advantage of their parents’ formative witness in regards to the physical, moral, psychological, or emotional dimensions of human sexuality because of parental divorce, separation, or neglect.

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Our wish list for the Synod on Synodality and the Vatican’s upcoming document on divorced-and-remarried Catholics

We are privileged every day to walk alongside men and women seeking healing from the myriad ways their parents’ split has affected them and, keeping all ACODs close to our hearts, we wanted to share a “wish-list” for what we would love to see included both at the Synod and in the Vatican document.

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We Have To Keep Trying

But my mom was human. Both my parents were human. And the very fact that in spite of the deep pain and abuse that my mom went through for most of her life, she still tried…SHE TRIED. That is the difference.

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The Good Divorce vs. The Great Divorce

Trevor Jimenez’s animated short "Weekends" is a striking narrative that conveys the trauma of parental divorce in such imagery. The autobiographical film tells the story of a young boy spending weekdays with his mother and weekends with his father. Although the boy seems fine on the outside, his inner turmoil is exposed through a series of dreams and struggles.

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Pure Motherly Love

A couple of months ago, I was attending a women’s retreat... where glossy tiles of neutrals and shades of blue formed a gorgeous mosaic of the Blessed Mother. I kept returning my gaze to it, and I heard in prayer: “I see you looking at my mother—her maternal love is so different from what you have seen… My mother is tender, approachable, truly sacrificial, and only able to love fully and purely…”

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Life-Giving Wounds Comes to RVCC: An Adjunct Faculty Member’s Personal Testimony to the Board of Trustees at Raritan Valley Community College

I have to be honest, I never thought that my world as a Catholic and my world as a professor at a public institution of higher education could ever meet together, yet coincide beautifully into one. But with God, anything is possible, so I continue to remain in thankful awe as to how He brings about good works.

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Divorce and Adolescence: How My Parent’s Divorce Impacted Me as a Teenager and How I am Finding Healing

As a teenager, I began to experience mere anger, seemingly without any other emotion or feeling that I had no control over, and had no idea where it came from or why it would get so out of control. ... This was a tomb that I suffocated inside of for years throughout much of my adolescence.

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Insights from Attachment Theory for Adult Children of Divorce (Part 1: An Overview of Attachment Theory)

Attachment—I used to think of it as a bad word, something we must avoid at all costs. I believed that attachment and feelings of dependency were signs of weakness, and I wanted to be strong. I thought Catholics needed to be detached from all things in order to serve God. I was mistaken.

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"But what about abuse and toxic relationships?” (Or: So, about that viral reel…)

A few weeks back, Life-Giving Wounds social media coordinator Jen made a short reel for our Instagram page. The reel, a mere five seconds long, featured this audio clip: “This might be an unpopular opinion, but I’m going to share it anyways” with this text on the screen: “Divorce impacts the children involved and causes a deep wound.” ... But what happened next surprised all of us.

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Walking into Marriage Together: One Perspective on the Wedding Ceremony

If you come from a background of family brokenness, I would like to offer encouragement as you look ahead to your wedding day. Brides and grooms—choose wedding customs and traditions that are meaningful to you. You have the freedom to make the choices that express who you are and what you hope for your future marriage and how you want to remember or to celebrate your past.

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Caregiving of our elderly parents

I searched my heart for months and I accepted how I felt about this situation and made a decision. I realized that if I did not take care of them my guilt would have been much worse than I had experienced in my life. My father remained at his home with home health care and I oversaw his care. My mother eventually spent the last nine months of her life at home with my husband and me.

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How to Heal When You Feel Like an Orphan

About one year ago something very traumatic happened... My precious, amazing mom passed away... My world shattered the day that I lost her. Watching her suffer for months and being powerless to help her made me feel like I could relate in some way to our Blessed Mother, to the agony and helpless that she must have felt in watching her beloved Son die.

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